LAGANAPHYLLIS SIMNOVORII
THE COMMON COW PLANT
Laganaphyllis Simnovorri, more commonly known as the Cow Plant, was grown in a lab by combining cow DNA with that of the Venus Flytrap. This experiment resulted in one of the most popular designer plants of our time.
There is much we don't know about this remarkable animal-plant cross-breed yet despite being completely dependent on humans for it's care. What we do know is that it requires sunlight and water, like most plants, and it does photosynthesize. Much like the Venus Flytrap, and unlike the cow, it is carnivorous and requires feeding every 12 hours. If not fed the plant will, in deed, eat humans and use the nutrients gained to produce a strange milk with mood enhancing qualities.
There is much we don't know about this remarkable animal-plant cross-breed yet despite being completely dependent on humans for it's care. What we do know is that it requires sunlight and water, like most plants, and it does photosynthesize. Much like the Venus Flytrap, and unlike the cow, it is carnivorous and requires feeding every 12 hours. If not fed the plant will, in deed, eat humans and use the nutrients gained to produce a strange milk with mood enhancing qualities.
THE LIFE CYCLE OF THE COWPLANT
Despite the growing popularity of the cow plant in the last 14 years, people are under the assumption that the average amateur backyard horticulturist can grow a cow plant by splicing together various plants. This rumour is being spread via the internet by a handful of people who have made claims they have had success in plant splicing. These claims have yet to be verified.
SproutThe cow plant stays in sprout form for up to 48 hours. It looks like tiny cow horns poking out of the soil. During this time it will need water and fertilizer. This is a fast growing plant even with little care. Proper care accelerates the growth and it is possible to have a fully grown cow plant within a week.
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Mature Plant
The full grown cow plant can live indefinitely with the proper care. The stem has thickened and developed thorns to protect it from predators, such as squirrels and chipmunks, that may chew on it's stem. Much like a tree, part of the root system can be seen above ground. The plant now has an udder that will produce a strange addictive milk after eating human prey. The horns are purely decorative and are not used in self-defense, unlike the cow.
The cow plant also grows faux cake on it it's tongue. This unique evolutionary design is used to lure in human prey, as humans can not resist cake, to prevent starvation. The mature cow plant requires no watering and is solely dependent on a diet of meat, preferably fish. Swordfish is a known favorite of the cow plant. |